How to Create Presence
How to Create Presence
What is this elusive thing called presence people desire? A
viewer recently wrote in asking about how to cultivate more presence in
their life. I'd like to devote a little more attention to it via this
article.
Firstly let's define presence. Have you ever been at a social gathering, party or function and met someone who exuded a mysterious quality? It may have been an attractive quality, a distinguished grace or a peaceful nature which compelled you closer to them.
It may have been something elusive which you're unable to qualify. They seem comfortable in their own skin; they're in control of their surroundings. They move about the room as if floating on thin air, while exuding an unmistakable allure.
People who have presence have an inner glow which radiates outward; even the blind are aware of them. They're comfortable and content within themselves. They seldom walk or move in haste. Their gestures are timed and controlled, as if rehearsed. They rarely seek approval from others yet, others seek approval from them.
I've witnessed many such people exude presence over time. Upon reflection they remain the most genuine and grounded people. Others may incorrectly assert this as an act, although I am loath to buy into that argument given the congruity of maintaining such an 'act.'
So how does one create presence? Why would you want presence anyway? I'm glad you asked. Having presence is the outward reflection of your inner world. It's a signal or frequency advising others you're in control; in charge of your life. You are the master and architect of your destiny.
People fall into one of two categories; leaders or followers. If you're a leader you're fortunate to inspire and lead others toward revealing their uniqueness. If you're a follower, you are privy to being the recipient of such leadership.
There is nothing wrong with being a follower; let's make that distinction clear. I've looked up to and modelled myself on a number of great leaders over time. All of them had unique qualities which I sought to incorporate and become inspired by.
Psychologists suggest any time you recognise a quality in another person you admire, you already posses that quality within yourself. So presence is recognising a hidden quality within you which seeks expression - how cool is this stuff!
Here are three qualities for creating presence in your life. They are by no means an entire list, although ones I believe important. Allow me to render a caveat expressing that it takes time and patience to create presence. You cannot rush the process any more than you nurture and tend to a child.
You can't wake up one day with more presence. You fill your way into it much like water filling up a bath tub. Remember water always finds its own level.
1. Know thyself, grow thyself.
When you learn more about yourself and know yourself inside out, you discover what you're capable of. You discover your hidden talents; your flaws, your genius and magnificence.
For example if you're inherently shy, cultivating presence may be slightly challenging than an extrovert. I'm yet to meet a shy leader - have you? Identifying your shyness might invoke a commitment to work on developing your inner leader and allowing your light to shine.
I'm not advocating shy people are less socially developed. I'm suggesting shyness and leadership don't go hand in hand. As someone who regularly speaks before audiences I experience shyness when I meet new people one on one. I am far more relaxed these days and allow my inner light to shine when I feel relaxed and comfortable with the person I am interacting with. This has taken a great deal of commitment from my part to step out of my comfort zone.
2. Presence occurs within 'the moment.'
Presence occurs when you're engaged in the moment. You don't get out of bed, go to a party and turn on presence. Some actors, models and singers might have the ability to; though I assure you they retreat into silence and comfort the moment they're away from the attention.
You cannot be ON all the time. You cannot put up a facade by staging presence. A useful analogy is being a light house whose light is ready and waiting to guide the ships into shore. You must become the beckon of light for others to see and feel. It happens when you're open and receptive to being engaged in the moment.
If you're unsure about how to live in the present moment or would like to learn more about it, this video will highlight some key points.
The key to gaining presence is to be alive and awake to the moment. Your task is to remove fear and anxiety from your life, thus enabling you to see opportunities. That is the true essence of living in the moment. You're not a victim to your past or a slave to the future.
3. Harness self awareness and inner wisdom.
What I mean by harnessing self awareness and inner wisdom is accessing your inner guide; your inner teacher. Have you ever been in a situation and heard an inner voice or feeling summoning you to take action? I'm not suggesting hearing voices either - you know, that quiet whisper echoing from within.
You may have taken inspired action without any prior knowledge of the situation. You may have found yourself in a new place, meeting someone totally random and completely oblivious to how you got there. You may have accidentally dialled the wrong number and wound up speaking to someone you haven't spoken to in years.
These are situations where you accessed your inner guide, otherwise known as intuition. It's an inner force and wisdom which knows no bounds and limitations; yet has the answers to all your questions.
When you learn to work with this inner knowledge, you access an inner presence and spirit always waiting to be revealed. Try it out for size. Like learning to ride a bike, you don't become proficient being on two wheels, but through trial and error. You create boundaries of what is possible and what is not.
The more you become adept at accessing your inner wisdom, the more others will see the beauty and magic emanating from your soul nature. You become the lighthouse others are attracted to.
Allow these points to work for you by incorporating them into your life. Learn and build on them through patience, trial and error. Don't be surprised if and when you make mistakes. Be kind to yourself - you're learning, growing and evolving.
There are no such things as failures in life; only the opportunity to make things better and grow mentally, emotionally and spiritually.
Firstly let's define presence. Have you ever been at a social gathering, party or function and met someone who exuded a mysterious quality? It may have been an attractive quality, a distinguished grace or a peaceful nature which compelled you closer to them.
It may have been something elusive which you're unable to qualify. They seem comfortable in their own skin; they're in control of their surroundings. They move about the room as if floating on thin air, while exuding an unmistakable allure.
People who have presence have an inner glow which radiates outward; even the blind are aware of them. They're comfortable and content within themselves. They seldom walk or move in haste. Their gestures are timed and controlled, as if rehearsed. They rarely seek approval from others yet, others seek approval from them.
I've witnessed many such people exude presence over time. Upon reflection they remain the most genuine and grounded people. Others may incorrectly assert this as an act, although I am loath to buy into that argument given the congruity of maintaining such an 'act.'
So how does one create presence? Why would you want presence anyway? I'm glad you asked. Having presence is the outward reflection of your inner world. It's a signal or frequency advising others you're in control; in charge of your life. You are the master and architect of your destiny.
People fall into one of two categories; leaders or followers. If you're a leader you're fortunate to inspire and lead others toward revealing their uniqueness. If you're a follower, you are privy to being the recipient of such leadership.
There is nothing wrong with being a follower; let's make that distinction clear. I've looked up to and modelled myself on a number of great leaders over time. All of them had unique qualities which I sought to incorporate and become inspired by.
Psychologists suggest any time you recognise a quality in another person you admire, you already posses that quality within yourself. So presence is recognising a hidden quality within you which seeks expression - how cool is this stuff!
Here are three qualities for creating presence in your life. They are by no means an entire list, although ones I believe important. Allow me to render a caveat expressing that it takes time and patience to create presence. You cannot rush the process any more than you nurture and tend to a child.
You can't wake up one day with more presence. You fill your way into it much like water filling up a bath tub. Remember water always finds its own level.
1. Know thyself, grow thyself.
When you learn more about yourself and know yourself inside out, you discover what you're capable of. You discover your hidden talents; your flaws, your genius and magnificence.
For example if you're inherently shy, cultivating presence may be slightly challenging than an extrovert. I'm yet to meet a shy leader - have you? Identifying your shyness might invoke a commitment to work on developing your inner leader and allowing your light to shine.
I'm not advocating shy people are less socially developed. I'm suggesting shyness and leadership don't go hand in hand. As someone who regularly speaks before audiences I experience shyness when I meet new people one on one. I am far more relaxed these days and allow my inner light to shine when I feel relaxed and comfortable with the person I am interacting with. This has taken a great deal of commitment from my part to step out of my comfort zone.
2. Presence occurs within 'the moment.'
Presence occurs when you're engaged in the moment. You don't get out of bed, go to a party and turn on presence. Some actors, models and singers might have the ability to; though I assure you they retreat into silence and comfort the moment they're away from the attention.
You cannot be ON all the time. You cannot put up a facade by staging presence. A useful analogy is being a light house whose light is ready and waiting to guide the ships into shore. You must become the beckon of light for others to see and feel. It happens when you're open and receptive to being engaged in the moment.
If you're unsure about how to live in the present moment or would like to learn more about it, this video will highlight some key points.
The key to gaining presence is to be alive and awake to the moment. Your task is to remove fear and anxiety from your life, thus enabling you to see opportunities. That is the true essence of living in the moment. You're not a victim to your past or a slave to the future.
3. Harness self awareness and inner wisdom.
What I mean by harnessing self awareness and inner wisdom is accessing your inner guide; your inner teacher. Have you ever been in a situation and heard an inner voice or feeling summoning you to take action? I'm not suggesting hearing voices either - you know, that quiet whisper echoing from within.
You may have taken inspired action without any prior knowledge of the situation. You may have found yourself in a new place, meeting someone totally random and completely oblivious to how you got there. You may have accidentally dialled the wrong number and wound up speaking to someone you haven't spoken to in years.
These are situations where you accessed your inner guide, otherwise known as intuition. It's an inner force and wisdom which knows no bounds and limitations; yet has the answers to all your questions.
When you learn to work with this inner knowledge, you access an inner presence and spirit always waiting to be revealed. Try it out for size. Like learning to ride a bike, you don't become proficient being on two wheels, but through trial and error. You create boundaries of what is possible and what is not.
The more you become adept at accessing your inner wisdom, the more others will see the beauty and magic emanating from your soul nature. You become the lighthouse others are attracted to.
Allow these points to work for you by incorporating them into your life. Learn and build on them through patience, trial and error. Don't be surprised if and when you make mistakes. Be kind to yourself - you're learning, growing and evolving.
There are no such things as failures in life; only the opportunity to make things better and grow mentally, emotionally and spiritually.
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